I keep reading comments on blogs and forums posted by aspie spouses who suffer from chronic illnesses. If there are studies that have researched this I'd like to know more.
Caregivers who don't take care of themselves can suffer physically as well as mentally and emotionally. Not resting enough, not eating well enough, not exercising...all these play a part in deterioration of health.
And then there is the lack of empathy issue when one is suffering.
"I'm tired." I say. Aspie spouse responds "But you just got up." I'm tired mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually! Just because I am standing and walking around and YOU CANNOT PHYSICALLY SEE MY TIREDNESS doesn't mean I am not tired!
My child says "my head and throat hurt so bad!" Aspie father says "I think you're fine." Just because he is walking around and not vomiting doesn't mean he is not sick!
And so we learn, sad as this is, pathetic as this is, we learn that in order for him to recognize that we are not well enough to do work around the house/go to school/whatever he is requiring of us, we must not get out of bed. We must be sure to LOOK physically sick or else we "most certainly are not sick."
And so we learn to stay in bed, exaggerating the look of our illness in order to get the most miniscule hint of understanding that we are not feeling well. We do this so too much won't be demanded of our weakened systems. And then we aren't getting the exercise we need and we are not eating well enough and are not taking care of ourselves in any other way. It's self-preservation that barely preserves.
And chronic illness may be common for those who live with aspies.
You don't say.