Another illness hit me recently, which meant another time of being painfully ignored by my aspie spouse.
My young son asked "Are you okay Mom? I hope you feel better! I love you!" and he gave me a hug.
My spouse acted perturbed that my illness messed up his plans for the day. He didn't once ask how I was feeling or if he could bring me anything.
As I was crying and praying and reading the Bible, I thought of the solemn vows I took before God to love this man for better or worse, in sickness and in health. I have always thought "of course I'll love him when he's sick . . . I'll take care of him!"
I had never before thought how hard it may be to love him when I am sick! But I vowed to do just that.
Man, is it ever hard.
Our church teaches that the Bible allows for divorce in the cases of adultery and abandonment (and of course, physical abuse). But I do not believe being ignored when I am ill is Biblical grounds for divorce.
So if I can't run away . . . I need to face the situation I am in, and face it as a Christian should. I believe God is sovereign, so He is in control and has ordained every situation I face for my good, that I may be sanctified/made more like Christ. (Romans 8:28) He put me in this asperger marriage, and has a plan for my good. I am called to be loving, to persevere in the faith, and yes, even to be thankful during the worst of times as well as the times that are better.
I frequently send up a quick but sincere plea . . . Lord, help me!